LIFE X UGLYDUCKLING X SPONSOR

photo credit : MEL JUSTICE

wearing

top : miss selfridge inspired bird button up from UGLYDUCKLING

bottoms : high waist orange acid denim from ZARA

shoes : velvet flats from Bangkok

"Man. Because he sacrifices his health in order to make money.
Then he sacrifices money to recuperate his health.
And then he is so anxious about the future that he does not enjoy the present;
the result being that he does not live in the present or the future;
he lives as if he is never going to die, and then dies having never really lived."

A quote that I read somewhere but just can't remember.

i find it very motivating and reminds me of how short life really is,

and how much time we have to appreciate life more than money.

Have you guys been teased before? 

Appearance in a more specific field.

I have, and till today my friends do usually still tease about my appearance.

from browsing back my archive i may seem to have a pretty clean normal perfect girly life,

the reason why i wanna share something more personal with you guys now is because

things actually have been pretty perfect recently (besides college assignments & work).

My life, after opening this new named blog sundaesins, 

has turned over a new leaf.

blogging practically made my thinking changed in a much more mature way,

and i always stay real and be honest talking to you guys

because who would wanna read a fake blog right? 

so now i wanna share something quite private with you guys just for experience sake.

and to the people who think that teasing your friends' appearance isn't such a big deal,

it is, when it's constant.

***

I think it was since primary that I've been teased a lot, like literally everyday,

up till high school, the past was still there and it brought me to a point where i opened up my blog

called emolyjules just to rant about my everyday teenager life.

i can say that's how i got really good grades actually when it came to essays and grammar writing,lol.

but however, I'm not proud to say that i felt very suicidal at a point of my confused teenager life.

you know, all those boyfriend girlfriend appearance family dramas leaded me 

to hold a penknife/scissors/blade anything sharp and to leave scars around my body area.

I know it's the most immature and stupid way of releasing your "pain"

but at that point i just wanted to make sure i stopped crying;

so everytime i "cut" myself, i could feel a sense of reality from 

the fantasy world that i made myself lived in.

i think the emo kids would know what i'm talking about now,

cause i was definitely an emo kid during my high school days.

I didn't had much friends to talk me out of my problems,

and i was basically very stubborn, no matter how much my close friends tried,

i just wouldn't listen.

and then again, I didn't have a very good connection with the family,

so basically there was no one i could really go to when i'm in that suicidal phrase.

a lof of my suicidal thoughts came from heartbreaking immature relationships,

and of course, constant onslaught of people making fun of me or my looks,

they would say that i'm ugly, so ugly, so fat, so stupid, etc etc all those bad stuffs.

and i guess that's one of the reasons why it's very difficult for me to boost my confidence uptill now.

and truthfully no matter how much you try to ignore it,

some arrow just shoots in the deep roots of your heart.

It's good to know who your real friends are

because real friends don't laugh at each other's flaws.

they accept each others' flaws and just enjoy the journey of life together.

What i could do is try to ignore the people who laughs and enjoy the future. 

accept the truth and just live life to the fullest! 

just be yourself and live for who you really are,

and so that's why i don't mind sharing this ugly past of mine to you guys.

I can't say cutting myself made me who i am today,

but haha, i can say that it definitely made me more mature in a way.

how do i explain this. lol, this post is getting really long!

so back to topic,

the reason why i wanted to talk about appearance is because i was very fortunately sponsored by UGLYDUCKLING for this lovely printed top.

when you talking about the name UGLYDUCKLING you straight away think about our childhood fairytale.

about how the ugly duckling turned into a beautiful swan and flew away (something like that i can't remember haha!)

"Fashion is our heartbeat and we hope to expand from just an Online Shop. Watch out ladies, we’re on our way and that’s for sure!"

doesn't that sound very much like from the story UGLY DUCKLING to you ? 

haha, i guess that's what inspired me to write this long post for.

to say that I'm a thin line between the ugly duckling and the swan,

I can't say that I'm a swan yet because i think everyone's like me.

you're not 100% ugly, neither you're 100% pretty either. 

you're in between so remember that it's not right to critize or tease people about their looks.

lol, because the swans are gonna come chase your ass! 

oh wait, or is that the goose...... lol.

life's been good recently, apart from being really stressed up from college work 

i can say that it's gonna be a smooth sailing ahead... 

for all you people who feel down and hopeless at times, 

i really wish i could personally go up to you and give you a hug

because i really needed one when i was like you.

so imma givve you a REALLLLLL big virtual hug right now! 

feel it ? 

:)