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Saturday, January 22, 2011


it's so sweet to have a guy that could play the guitar and you could just sing along and know every song he's playing till the end of the day.

just finished a day of recording a mixed tape for a friend.
and it was awesome.
i remember the last time i seriously sat down and sing just with guitar and vocal was last last year when i was still 17...
i miss those days were my friend played the guitar and i just sang and sang and sang.
today i just sang till my voice went away. haha.

i'm making such comparisons at small things that i just don't get the chance to get.
i was kindda touched my this friend had so many good friends who gave her this surprise. haha. even if it wasn't for me.
everyone was taking their time off and putting effort just to record this for her.
haha, feels the lurve... and i even sang one song for her. teehee :P
too bad for me, everytime my birthday it's always a holiday.
I never get the chance before to celebrate my birthday or throw a party with my whole gang of friends.
I'm just used to going to parties, rather than throwing one.
this year's also a holiday on my birthday , wonder where i'll be.
sunway or tampin.
either one also i have not much friends to celebrate with me ady.. :/
quite sad tho, every year is like always alone.. haha...

now, every freaking eventful day seems meaningless to me ady....
the feeling was numb since last year..
i still remember my last year birthday was with my ex but it sucked so bad.
christmas i had spent it the whole day on a plane, it was a terrible day for me cause the moment i wake up in the morning ady was a bad side of the bed.
then new year, just watch the fireworks and later on had some conflict with my love one,
i can't remember what it was but i remembered it as a tiring day of emotions.
Then Thaipusam. not to say i celebrate lah, but i did nothing oso, haaha..
then chinese new year, which is coming in about one week time.
I have 0 new clothes.....
why ? i went Pav that day and bought NOTHING. beside the MCR Cd
I saw this pretty Guess shoe i want, and it's only like 250.
come on, heels from Guess with discount, ain't expensive right ? it's just 250 ... but my mom hated them cause she said they looked too chunkhy.
wth. I like not you like what.
She wanted to buy me Aldo shoes which cost like 400 but i told her i don't wanna buy a pair of normal heels which cost That much.
come on la 400 can buy lots of stuffs k ? :/
I don want my left foot 200 , my right foot 200 . later broken or scratch how?
I Heartache lah fucker cheebai!!!
*sigh * many things . no ALL the things I like my mom doesn't like.
All the things she likes I don't like :(
WTFUCK.
other peoples mom just give their kids money and spend on anything you like but my mom's like.. urgh...
please la I wear not you wear. wtf.
Damn fed up, every time shopping with her is a total piece of bore.
everytime I wanna buy something I like she's like :" don't simply waste my money "
fuck la. you bring me shopping buy ask me not to spend is what shit you give me?
I can't buy them myself cause i ain't got no money,
even if i had money i would need it to get my hair done, cut and colored...
and KL pricing is WAYYYYYYY more expensive :/
*sigh * wonder if i'll ever get my hair done and at least buy one piece of dress for new year :(

quite sad la when i think of it. 1st time i haven't got any clothes yet...
feel like I'm so poor....
I miss my ah ma.... last time when she wasn't in wheelchair lagi we would go shopping together ...
she and my ah kong would give me money summore...
my dad? he doesn't even care lah.
I go places go distances he also never give me a cent.
*sigh again* after new year I need to save up for a DSLR sommmore,
approximately 4-5k i guess?
god damn, how am I able to save that much???
work I guess, need to search for work after my this sem ends...
which means I can only get my DSLR after april :/
WALAO...... so damn freaking long :( ISHHHHH haizzzzz

don't even have to think of buying a 1k chinchilla ..
come on la. frreaking cute.
I pat it the other day and it was so damn soft. :(
like a cotton candy .
Heartache lah. I can only see, but can never own.

it's not that I'm greedy or anything. but is it unfair for me to gain some materialistic joy ?
*double sigh *
fuck money problems. FUCK!!!


let's just forget about it.

I think i should start reading my Dear John I bought from since last year.

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